One Water, One Family

The dream of the family.  The one that is not so pulled away from what good times mean.  The ones who drink in one another’s company.  And despite difference see beneath it the string of familiarity and inescapable unity.  Who are we to deny this for ourselves in our humanity.  Who are we, as individuals, to be spreading anything more than that unity.  Who are we, to enable the disease of hate?   For until we all find a pinnacle of perfection in ourselves and one another, we are bound to continue breaking each other down.   Even you, in your individuality, are part of a system.  A system of parts and pieces that work together to bring function.  If your mind decides it does not love the self, then the mind will work against the body at every turn.  Eventually it will break down in illness.  If we do not love and support one another as a system, it will continue to break down.

In this system we are bigger than politics, bigger than natural disasters, more brighter and full of potential than any self help seminar.

When your mind rebels against your heart, you have set yourself against yourself.  It will, in time, turn you against those who support you.

All of these are thoughts,  which serve as  multidimensional creatures.  Thoughts do not just stay inside of the head, for they are not separate from the blood, and our blood is not separate from water. Water flows into us and out of us.  The water from source, the exhalation of prayers into the night sky and the clouds above. All water is a physical manifestation of thought.  It is our Earth’s life blood.  It is in a sense, the greatest library of existence, flowing through each of us, sustaining us.

Bless the water, bless yourselves.  The transmutation you deeply seek in these tumultuous times is one you have control over.  When you bless the water, and you bless yourself you chose with your thoughts and breathe to be the best and brightest form of yourself.  The wisdom of the water, the keeper of our thoughts; will bring to the surface that which best meets your needs at the time and place of your journey now.  For we know water can cut canyons, creating beauty.  But a tsunami  of water can also destroy what you always thought you knew.  It cleans you off when you are dirty, your life force builds within it when you are being cradled in the womb.  There is no terrain water has not touched, no scene in history when it did not exist.  The knowledge you seek is already in side of you.  Like a library, you will find the answers you seek, once you are looking in the right section.  First you must acknowledge a need to go where the answers are.  It is time to consciously walk through the door.

Duality Transcendence

mindIn my dream I was told that nothing was gonna happen, nothing was going to change, that the biggest deception of all, believing the world will rearrange.

And in my dream I thought to myself, well if nothing changes, than I refuse to go on, because I have a purpose inside that tells me I have to keep keepin’ on.

The East and the West are melding and lines have only been drawn in our minds. This Red Electric Skywalker will teach you to walk the thin line, then how to absolve what you find.

In physicality we have demonstrated demonology, we have played the part of duality, it has been inside of you and me for as long as we remember.

But when you slumber there are chances to rise above it.  To see what it has done to us.  You’ve chosen your own symbology, decided what it means to be: Human. 

But the Spirit in you, the one you haven’t given much credit to, has been on the sidelines this entire time guiding you through the mucky muck, when you thought it was just random luck.

Face it, we have been coerced to see the worst in ourselves and one another.  We understand now the possibility that lies within negativity. 

It’s become so blatant to see all around us.  We have fussed, and fought; been internally wrought with confusion.  We have ignored our own solutions.  The little hiding gem beneath the soiled dirt, beyond the pain and hurt, is love. 

Just love unconditional. 

When you dig down to find it, you will be guided by the light it gives.  And when you finally hold it in your hands, you understand the duality of man, and how to transcend it.  We weren’t left here with out devices to find love when the time was right.  So now, it is time for the light to absolve us.  To lighten the load below us.  To walk the clouds of confidence that lift us in love.

For the things you do not love in yourself, there is solution.  Change yourself in internal evolution, let your cells speak of revolution, for they are fighting  back.  When the vibrations of the lower start to choke you, let Universal Unconditional Love, stroke you back to health. 

You are a potential wealth of love.  No one can give it to you, find it for you, or tell you exactly where to go… but if you listen without judgment, that heaven sent map will guide you on your individual way, to the place of your hearts calling. 

So to those who dismiss the greatest mission we have ever had, well they just haven’t found theirs yet.

Let go of the things you’ve been told forever, walk through the stormy weather with a smile.  All the while knowing, that this motion is the needed emotion to making the world a little bit better. 

Again she said,

This is all in your head.

A letter to my Dad.

I might be going off the deep end here but re-watch the matrix… ok,feather (1) now what i am thinking is that when i break down all these names that have been happening through the generations here in America, i find common threads all over, so if we live in the matrix than it is a sort of string theory tying it all together.

Names in our family range from Robert, Amanda, and Franklin, to Makepeace, Submit, Appendix , Addendum, Randall, Thankful, Orange, Charity, Severance, Consider, Porter, Polly Esther (your kidding right?) Perry, Naddy… the list goes on and it is FUCKIN creative… a story tellers dream pit of fictional names.

The stories are funny because repetition is a bitch.  You know how many young men and women have lost their partners and children in this family?  Too many to mention.  It’s all been done before. SOO my methodical, logical, creative, imaginative, and analytical brain asks… well if all the signs are there that we have done this one way before, but the signs also say we were always trying to do something different, and handle things a different way, what is it we can do, in the here and now, with all that knowledge to do things so extremely and beneficially different that it is different than any time before with similar circumstance.

My answer is love.  My answer is to see the signs, and the connection, look through the bullshit and realize your divinity, your participation in making this bigger story possible.  Be content, astounded and amazed daily by it.  Giggle at the recognition.  Revel at the chance to change the future with this knowledge, pass it along as your heart feels fit.  That is what now is, all of us seeing that we have made this up forever, and now is a time to act and react differently than any time before.

I think the wisdom of the wise women was bestowed on me once, I am not sure where.  But they couldn’t pass it down in any other way, than the word through the vibration.There were pictures before there were letters, and when the letters took over, the pictures in their true meaning lost their importance, and so they sat sort of lost.  Until the vibration in their soul recognized their true meanings.  So is the story of all of time.  There have been powers desecrating the word, messing with it’s vibration for a very long time.  Civilizations  have been killed for it.  When once the story of time was passed from voice vibration, and picture, split faction.  The story changes but certain pivotal points remain as guide stones.  The rest is recognized through the heart and spoken through that spot in the mind.  We’ve put it in our water, all our old thoughts, we’ve sent our wishes and prayers to the sky, condensation from our own breath adding to the atmosphere.  We have drank from an unending stream of thought, action, contemplation, and history through the process of water of which our body is 98%.  We have DNA, which holds a whole other story of possibility and then the addition of circumstances, and experience.

But then we have our mind and body.  How they interact with one another and the world around us.  That feeling of sickness after being around some one who sucks the life force out of you…

We have the knowing something just isn’t right, or the “unintentional” injury which grounds us from an obligation or engagement for some reason.  There is always a reason.  I am here, because I remember.  I have done this ALL before.  SO have you, but you have to see it and feel it for yourself, so that is your responsibility if you chose to take it on. I have seen this for myself forever, I am here because this is it for me.  This is the time I GET IT.  This is the time, that I share all of what I know and throw caution to the wind, because this, this physical thing, is what it is, temporary, but this knowing inside of me goes on and one forever and ever amen.

So this is the beginning of  download you may or may not be aware of at this moment.  If you watch my videos you get my vibe.  I am your friendly grandmother, and your cool ant, and your best friend and your older sister.  I am here to encourage the enlightenment of others by seeing themselves for so much more than main stream allows them to be.   There are 13 tribal grandmothers in the world who carry the stories.  I think I may be one who carries on that lineage.

I am either so full of shit that i should have crap in my mouth at this moment, or there is a reason i have felt really odd and special my whole life, and why i have felt depressed and in need of information… but Dad, seriously, I AM HIGH on the fact that I know I don’t want to be anything more than me, and in my totality of ability, and these deep seated dream like desires we have are not pointless or with out reason, they are actually like a pirate map to the treasure.  Video game, Matrix, Synchronicity, Irony, Manipulation… on and on, basically we know what the secret codes are, but the computer playing against us sets up distractions from getting to the goal,so if you lost the guide book to the game, or the cheat sheet, you are left to your own perhaps incapable devices.  Most people when they talk about playing the game or the game plays you, are talking far more materially.  But this is more like the Spiritual game, and how to play it, is to first recognize you are playing it, that there is a game happening, and then you figure out who you are, and what roll you play and all the while you do this you build your artillery, and you move up the ranks and complete challenges, until you are at a place where you are in the final stage.  And all of the challenges are basically a cumulative of all the other levels, and you can sort of predict the behavior and know what to do, but that final, final level, is EVERYTHING ALL AT ONCE.  And it is sooo muther fucking overwhelming, more intense than any other end level challenge, because this is the FINALE, sooooo how do you respond?

With confidence, knowing, recognition, and perhaps after a couple of trial runs, a NEW strategy.

Think about it

Yeah, this is your daughter

I need something new, Running has been the answer and yes I am a lunatic

Running, running, always running. But it only seems to break an internal sweat. I am sick of myself lately. Sick of how I look. It isn’t my hips that are bothering me this time. It’s my skin. My epidermal tissue. My biggest organ. I have burning inside of me and I am feeding it with fire and spicy foods. If I am already burning inside, why am I introducing more fire?
My life feels stagnation and I am burning holes into myself from the inside out. I am smoking as I write, I see the growing problem and it’s influences. I need a purpose to start my day differently. I have grown accustom to my lazy life. I am unsure how to get back on track because this aesthetic that I speak of keeps me tied down alone.
Sunbtle shifts of attitude come when men pay attention to me. Using the influence like a drug, feeding myself until it runs out and I slump inside myself again. Riding from one high to the next propelled by hormones. When the options have dried up, so do I .
I felt it again last night. I want to run far away and start again. But not all the the way back to the beginning. I am sort of sick of beginnings that lead to these ends. Something has got to change and I know it is me. I just feel so lost I’m not sure where to start and I am having a tough time taking advice from those who are also struggling. I need find successful support. I am ready.
Is asking enough because I feel I have been asking for a long time now, and it’s like I am still just treading water. I want the water to quench my fire.

The One Epiphany

The One Epiphany


Affirmations mean something.

Think of all those times you told yourself that you suck.

Or maybe you aren’t “good “ it.


Or maybe how many times you confirmed you were “lucky.”

We have categorized ourselves, and chanted mantras we call labels; embedding ourselves in archetypes we don’t necessarily want, but feel are necessary.  Some one has to be the ”loser” and the “winner,” right?

You can observe any group of people and see the power trips and roles everyone steps in to.  While in their minds and hearts, they feel so much more than they express.  Just day to day dealing, taking over the roles of our forefathers.


The styles change, and yet, the attitudes stay the same?


I do see the cracking of a brilliant uprising.

The take off is perhaps slower than some one of this “instant gratification” mind set would like… but it IS happening.


I remember where I come from.   It seemed so behind; on fashion… I had to travel at least 50 miles away for anything “hip.”  I thought style had something to say about how progressive a place was, and it was obvious to me; my home town was not it.


Now, I am not going to say I am a fashion guru, or anything; but I have noticed that things I sway toward, end up finding their way into main stream.  Not because I copy any one,  but because I work with what I have.  It is ecclectic and recycled.  I make unique personalization where I can.


That plain and simple is my take on EVERYTHING.

That is how I have lived, even when I lived in a place where thinking that way was treated as unacceptable by most authority.

And yet those who supported it, are the reason I continue today.  Attempting to allow the Authenticity to SHINE.

So we go back to things changing and the need for affirmation.


Well, where I come from, I thought, “this is so bass ak-wards. This will be the last place that get’s it.”

I couldn’t explain “it” to you then, but all it is, is  truth and authenticity…

I am glad to say that I think my peers are getting it.  I think it is less where we came from, but who in our hearts we knew we wanted to be.  We just had the open spaces to experience it.

Those of us, who chose to grow up where we did; when we did, to those family we choose.  We did so because  we knew the time was right, and what we had to do was important.  We would also have the right space and freedoms; as well as challenges to formulate those ideals for ourselves.

Perhaps we don’t remind ourselves and each other that enough.


We ARE here for something.

We Do have a lot  to learn, and teach.

Things are changing and it is BECAUSE of US!

Perhaps that is the affirmation we all need.


Not sometimes,




Not all of us are blessed with wide open spaces, or rugged outdoor places to see divinity in  it’s more serene state.  Perhaps all you have is the bustling city.


Regardless, the face of creation and expansive expression is there.

And YOU are a part of it.

It is not unattainable.



People most recognize and love this in children.  Especially their own.

They are in awe at their own creation.

But each of us, is that.

Embodiment of creation.

We are nothing but creativity.

Every idea, every movement.

Every sentence, and every action.

Good, or bad.  To each his or her own…


It is an improvisational play, where most of the roles are inherited; picked up, adopted… but our amazing creativity allows so much more.


The secret caverns of our heart tell us through weird emotions like, jealousy, and anger.

There must be; there is, so much more!

If you have ever said to yourself; I wish I was an artist, a writer, an actor, a musician.


I would say to you this, You ARE!

You have every moment to be an artist at living life. Dancing your way through circumstance and painting yourself OUT of a corner.

A writer of your own script, for your life; through your affirmation and attitude.  Will you only observe or will you chose to participate?

You are the star of your life, and you can be anything you chose, but only if you take action through choice… other wise you are chosen by life for the role you play in the cast. You can only ask yourself how you ended up in the ensemble if you never stood up for the staring role.

And YOU and only you can beat YOUR drum, whether or not you follow the beat of those around you, is solely  up to you.  But every one has their own rhythm and style, it’s up to the player to practice their song.


Do not say you wish to be any of these things… Only realize you already are that which you seek, and step whole heartedly into your place.    If you don’t, you will have no one to blame but yourself for not taking a chance, on all you have been given; YOURSELF.


We are all feeling the growing pains of realization.  Encourage yourself, and one another as you see yourselves for who you forgot you were.



Ah, Memories

Sometimes, I think it is possible that we hold things in for too long, yep, even I am guilty of holding a fart  in  for too long… But I am talking deeper than gas. “Deeper?” you ask.  Yeah.  Deeper.

Honestly, I want to be proud of myself for handling death so well in my life.

YAY! High five, Mandie!

Errrrr, what?!?!

Yeah, I want to say, “YOU know what? I have had tremendous loss in my life, and it’s OKAY, it’s FINE.  I TOTALLY DEAL WITH IT, I have a different sort of relationship to death…” and then I walk away with a crazy look in my eye.

The fact is, I usually deliver those exact  lines with a very sweet tone, and walk off with a little bit of superiority over those who couldn’t possibly fathom  what it is to loose people close to you.

Great, I am using loss as a way to be self righteous… just as I was thinking I might be humble.

The fact is, I am going to call my family out, hell I am going to call out any of you who don’t discuss it… WE MISS PEOPLE BEING THERE IN PHYSICALITY.

We miss seeing people age, and grow, and evolve.  We miss late night conversations on the phone, advice, the sound of their voice.  Some of us just miss what we never really knew to begin with, and then we based our imaginative relations off of what was observed in the lives of others.  Some of my observations of YOU and your lives at times has sparked with in me jealousy… Oh yes, even you….

Tonight, I was thinking about my brother, who is now gone, and earlier I was thinking of the mother I lost.

And I was thinking about how pissed I am on one sense; that my brother left me in this awkward situation that almost feels like divorce where the kids split with each parent.  Kevin and my mom got to transition to, you know… some other plane of reality, and I got to stay here with my dad… on Earth? (Come  on kids you know I am a big thinker who wants people  to be Organically Super Human…)

I love my dad to all ends of the Universe and back, but it’s like Kevin got some other end of the deal… like all that missing and wanting I had for my mother, he somehow got to fulfill for himself.. before ME!….I feel it was a bit, preemptive.

I am the oldest, in all conventional thought; which I have not yet purged obviously, says: the oldest dies first.

That happens to be the struggle of any parent who lost a child.

My grandparents lost my mom when she was 26.

My brother was gone months before he turned 24.

No wonder no one wants to talk about it… Parents don’t like to discuss the sad fates of their children… and let’s  give my dad a double whammy for losing his wife at 26 and then going another  round with young death again 23 years down the road with off spring of his dead bride…

This may be tough to read, but it’s all true, and it’s been bothering me for a while.  Perhaps you understand?

I have a half sister, but I am what remains of the interaction that was my birth mother and my father’s DNA.  At 30, I have out lived them both.

My step mother and half sister, will never really understand how awkward this life has been, (for me.)  They have each other to talk to. They have their relationship that has a physical beginning and continuing evolution…

Perhaps a point of jealousy in my life, I use to commiserate with my brother about…

This stuff sucks to write “out loud” but it’s part of what has happened that makes me feel this overwhelming urge to cry, but really, I can’t.  It feels contrived, and fake.

I guess, really I just have to say it out loud.  It lurks at the back of the mind and the corner of the heart and festers.

It saddens me, but  only in the most conventional of ways.  I wonder if I would be making late night phone calls to guy friends with girlfriends, if maybe I had a brother, or maybe even a mother to call.

I don’t know.  Again I ask why it is, they got to leave?

Why is it that even in my darkest times, when I wished life away, still, here I stay, in physicality.

Why at times does it feel so lonely?

I have my own answers and I will continue to spread joy, but loss…. oh that loss of those loved, still lingers in the painful heart strings embedded in muscle, deep in my memory.

It is not an excuse to be a victim, or superior, rather it is the reminder to cherish  all that is in the moment, and those who share it with you.

I do have a different relationship to death, than many do.

However evolved or different it may be, does not restrict me from feeling that occasional tug at my heart and mind, that longing of companionship linked in blood and experience.

Hell, that’s why the “Reunion” is so popular. the gathering of shared experience and the sprinkle of time spent apart changing.

Enjoy one another, be blessed with each others presence.  Physicality is a special, and yet very temporary experience.

We will meet again, another time; another place, in some other form.  But this experience is; in a sense, one in a billion.

The light and the dark are each beautiful because each of you dance between those worlds bound in your physical body.  Bound to learn how limitless you actually are.

That is death; limitless, expansive energy. Reconnected to Source, and yet still present.

Music; memories, pictures, lessons learned and given are the remnants of physicality.

The Eternal Soul, is just that.  Conscious Energy going back into a system of Co-Creative Learning , leaving material signs along the way.  A sort of ethereal scribbling on the bathroom wall “I WAS HERE.”

My brother and mother inspire me, every day.  I did not know them “all the way.”  But their influence and muse runs in my blood and through my pen, or paint, or speech.  They were creative people with short lives… I am a creative being who still has life…

May I be blessed then, with the talent of all of us, THREE!  Responsibility for the art that was left un-manifest, but lingering in the imagination!

May nothing be wasted.

Blessings to you!

Volume 2: Dissemination. (extreme language, adult humor, inane banter)

  • Our Buddy Mr Dick Talkin’ Dude has a nice response for me, and Women love a man who enters with a good insult… watch the dissemination process where he proves he must have fallen off the wagon.

    Did you bake your head in a microwave? I’m sorry, while it may take you “way to much energy” to compose something that is multiple paragraphs–and to process it as a result but I fucking have a bachelor’s and a master’s degree so the above so called output of “way too much energy” is about 1/10,000 of the output I have been trained to produce as a result of my education.


    You are started saying how this guy was messaging you about his small dick and it was bad pick up line. I responded by saying I am normal and I seem to have never had any problem. Then you started with the “women” fake it just to get guys off of them” bullshit. And so on… I didn’t make the conversation about me. If it’s not “too much energy” you could go back, read the texts, and see that you were steering the conversation. I was simply responding to you repeatedly saying the dumbest things–in refernce to sex–I have heard about sex. 

    You may think you’ve had great sex but what I know is that the “top shelf” for you was only mediocre if you size has something to do with. You don’t have to seek out my references. I was only siting them because they are from women who pretty much make all of the things you said bullshit. 

    You steered the conversation towards me. If you go back and read–and don’t hurt yourself by using “too much energy”–you will see that one of the first things I said about my sexual histpry was, “you don’t want to know.” You said, “I like answers.” So directly as a result of that statement I GAVE YOU ANSWERS. God you are dumb. 

    Since it was “too much energy” for you to read what I wrote. I don’t expect you to waste precious capacity–that you will need for sheep farming so you can be an “artist” lol–to actually go back and see that I was just responding to your assinine comments about dicks. 

    6-8 is good for you huh. Good luck with that. The Ramses study showed that only 8% of the world has more than 5.8 inches, which is the average size of a penis. Look it up on Wikipedia. 

    Anyway, I have better things to do with my time–and dick–than waste it on someone who does not consider the facts before she speaks. Whatever. 

    Hope reading this didn’t use “too much energy” Report this 

  • Jan. 6, 2011 – 9:52pm

    Good luck with your arrogance. Women love that in men.



  • Jan. 6, 2011 – 10:42pm

    (2:45:42 pm)Chews4Cheeses:I used to be a touring musician. I have had a pretty amazing and tragic life and i am just trying to settle down and have a cool ass relationship filled with travel, good food, amazing sex, movie watching, creativity, amazing sex, book reading, amazing sex, and amazing sex



    here you clearly have some needs and desires to bring up the topic of sex, inevitably leading to your dick 

    (2:49:27 pm)madgemidgley:this guy is texing me right now on here, and he is telling me about his small penis… not a good opener 

    my comment here is a preemptive, “I see your sex comments, please don’t talk about your dick, because this other dick is already doing it, and it’s not what I want to talk about…” i am surprised your bachelors and masters didn’t see that, but they didn’t really see your spelling errors either. What Subtext 101 and Reading Between the Lines wasn’t offered at your school… hmm poor curriculum. But since your pulling out punts, I wouldn’t really know, you know, since I am just a sheep farmer artist. 


    (2:49:47 pm)Chews4Cheeses:what did he say exactly 

    So I was guiding the conversation? Your a dude just brimming excited to talk about dicks, even if it isn’t your own. Sexual Repression much? It’s okay I hear a lot of guys lie to women on the internet because they can’t get them to lay with them in a bed. But you don’t know about that either, right, I forgot to read what you wrote. I might as well tell the truth right now, I don’t have eyes… 

    (2:52:38 pm)Chews4Cheeses:that is his way of findng out if you are one of those women who care about the size of a guys dick, which I have some personal opinons on 


    hmm, some opinions, lets look further to see if I ask for them? You obviously are starting the test here to see what my response is so that you can later associate dick size to being shallow… here you have me backed into a corner where I simply say what I know. I am not asking for you to respond to it, I am making a statement about me personally…. but wait, 

    (2:54:03 pm)Chews4Cheeses:that is extremely sad for you 

    now all of a sudden you want to judge my experience? Whose place is it of yours to judge my preference or to say I need something other than what I have had. They must teach you guy that stuff in college too. Jumping to conclusions and assumptions. Intelligent stuff. 

    Enter: a barrage of unnecessary and uninvited information. Again you are guiding this conversation. Taking some other dude’s 3 inch dilemma and turning the table to talk about… wait for it…. YOUR DICK. 

    I never asked. And something tells me a real sexual guru would be a bit more gentle on my lack of experience and not degrade me furthering my dislike for arrogant dicks, such as you have proven yourself to be. Not that I want to start any name calling, but since I have supposedly microwaved my head, I am going to say this is just observation and referential discourse. 

    (2:55:38 pm)Chews4Cheeses:I have had enough sex in my life to know that the size of a dick has nothing to do with making a woman have an orgasm 

    (2:55:46 pm)Chews4Cheeses:not that I am small 

    (2:55:55 pm)Chews4Cheeses:im normal 

    Now you may want to see a therapist, because all of this escalates and shows perhaps some insecurities in your masculinity. Here we have me, making just another statement that women fake it. Now, I don’t attempt to assume or accuse that they do with you; but that nasty insecurity sets in, and again makes it all about you…. 


    (2:56:25 pm)madgemidgley:women fake it honey to get it over with 

    (2:56:32 pm)Chews4Cheeses:lol 

    (2:56:37 pm)Chews4Cheeses:you think that 

    (2:56:50 pm)Chews4Cheeses:not with me 

    (2:57:18 pm)madgemidgley:ok mr. confidence 

    (2:57:27 pm)Chews4Cheeses:it’s not confidence 

    (2:57:46 pm)Chews4Cheeses:but why the hell would someone fake it to get it over with just to do it 4 more times 

    In fact, I never accuse you of anything. I make vague, blanket statements that you seem to take very personally. Perhaps you feel it is your mission to bring your gift to all women of the world and to correct their naive and impressionable minds with the glory of you and your talent Bachelor and Mastered Degreed Penis. I don’t k

    now. I don’t claim to know your purpose here on earth. 


    (2:58:18 pm)Chews4Cheeses:and i will straight call someone on it 

    (2:58:21 pm)madgemidgley:oh can you now, how do you do that 

    (2:58:36 pm)Chews4Cheeses:man, you are asking questions you really dont want the answers to 

    (2:58:38 pm)Chews4Cheeses:lol 

    (2:59:14 pm)madgemidgley:i like to hear answers 

    (2:59:21 pm)madgemidgley:one way is to kiss a girl after she cums 

    (2:59:41 pm)madgemidgley:if her mouth is cold she did, the blood rushes to the clit after orgasm just like the head of the penis 

    Here we have the dreaded “I like answers.” Now I am wondering if you reread these because it seems to me you must be drunk because you used all of the things I said in my email out of order and out of context. Did you go to school and study being a Lawyer? If not, it may not be too late. 

    Now previously you were talking about calling people out, because you “know what you know.” Now you said you know physical responses in women, and I wanted an answer to what physical responses you know to be true in women. You don’t answer, you just proceed to blow up on your skills some more. I didn’t ask about your sex skills Mr. Good Reader Guy Who Pays Attention And Likes To Berate People. I asked about KNOWN PHYSICAL RESPONSES IN WOMEN… 


    (3:01:52 pm)Chews4Cheeses:i just know what I am doing, it’s not confidence or an ego thing… I just know that I know what i am doing 

    (3:01:59 pm)Chews4Cheeses:for many reasons 

    (3:02:38 pm)Chews4Cheeses:it’s like me saying I can play the guitar extremely well 

    (3:02:41 pm)Chews4Cheeses:I can 

    (3:02:44 pm)Chews4Cheeses:thats it 

    (3:02:49 pm)Chews4Cheeses:just a fact 

    (3:04:25 pm)Chews4Cheeses:but with the guitar unlike sex I can just show you the awards i have won, or let you hear me play, sex is all talk until someone delivers 

    Here is more proof already in the conversation that you were not paying attention and quick to judge me about who started the conversation with at least 7 references to wanting sex. All this is chronological order with the time stamp… pay attention, women like that. 

    (3:07:06 pm)madgemidgley:yep and talking about it doesn’t like make me curious or anything… when men talk about it it comes across as shiesty 

    (3:07:13 pm)Chews4Cheeses:whatever 

    (3:07:23 pm)Chews4Cheeses:i didnt start the conversation 

    (3:07:27 pm)Chews4Cheeses::) 

    (3:08:35 pm)Chews4Cheeses:i wasn’t trying to make anyone curious, just responding to the things that are being said 

    (3:10:03 pm)madgemidgley:ohh but you were quick to tell of your “skills” or whatever 

    (3:10:22 pm)madgemidgley:easily a subtext that was unnecessary 

    (3:10:53 pm)Chews4Cheeses:my skills are not in quotes and if yu want i could give you refernces so that there is no question 

    Why the FUCK would I want references? YOU IMED ME! Are you trolling for sex, Deprivation Dude? If so, like I said, I am curious to the type your antics work on. 

    (3:11:46 pm)Chews4Cheeses:i was actually stating my skills in relation to whether size was factor in providing the appropriate amount of pleasure a woman desires which was simply a response to you saying ” 

    (3:11:52 pm)Chews4Cheeses:I won’t settle 

    AGAIN, NO ONE ASKED ABOUT YOUR SKILLS, YOUR SIZE OR YOUR PERSONAL OPINION IN REGARD! YOU guided a conversation and filled it with inane sexual knowledge about yourself. 

    (3:13:25 pm)madgemidgley:well despite the lack of consistent sex, i have had the oppertunity to try more than one size, and i am gonna say that for intercourse via penis in vagina, size TO ME matters, and therefor, if i am gonna put anything up there, it better fill it up right and press on all the right sopts 

    (3:13:30 pm)madgemidgley:spots 


    (3:14:11 pm)Chews4Cheeses:but in reality since you are not experienced enough sexually–your own words–to know if size is the ultimate deciding factor you will probably end up settling for someone who is larger and provides relatively less pleasure, not being aware that you are missing out you will then have a false sense of pride in the mundane unimaginative–on the guys part– 

    I never say size is the only thing that matters. This is one of the only things I have said personally about myself during this first exchange and that was taken out of context by you. There was no allowance for me to speak on anything but what I know. And since you do not question if I desire more than just a decent sized cock and the whole package of a person, you clearly take my wording toward wanting a man with a phallus in which is compatible to me, personal. There is nothing wrong with that. I make another personal statement that you feel a need to judge. Why so judgey about other people Judgy Mc Judgerson and the Judgeyville Judgers. 


    (3:16:50 pm)madgemidgley:thats a creative thought which i totally find inaccurate, as i am not one to keep myself in unsatisfying relations… just because i haven’t had a shit ton of sex doesnt mean i dont know what i like or what i am looking for an if a partner cant give what i need or augment their routine in a way that meets my needs, why stay around? 


    Here I am referencing your previous judgmental attitude toward my lack of experience. You are basically trying to sell me something I don’t want, and I am telling you “Hey man, I know what I know, you know what you know. We are looking for different things, we obviously are different people with different needs.” 

    (3:19:59 pm)Chews4Cheeses:OMG did yo just call me naive about sex? I don’t need to say anything further. That in itself is a very naive statment considering that I have women completely leave thier husbands and childrfen after sleeping with me–much to my dismay–and who have offered

    to writeme refernces, im not even kidding. size has no fucki fucking bearing in the quality of sex, at all, that is uless you have a freakishly large vagina


    (3:20:29 pm)madgemidgley:no i think it is naive to be general about sex and to assume all women need or feel the same thing 

    Again with assume and taking things really personally. Then on to talking about shit no one wants to hear about, Women leaving their Children and Husbands for the GURU OF FUCK!!! 


    All right, that about does it. Thank you SO much for this time. It has been really amusing going back and seeing what an interesting yet completely stero-typical part of the male race you are. This is going to make me giggle for days. I especially like how you feel you have some superiority over me because you have had a lot of sex and a couple of degrees. It actually makes you sound so much smarter knowing you are probably a potential breeding ground for various STD’s picked up during your musical and detached from reality days. We are all just people man, nobody is really better than anyone else. I really appreciate that I am a far better proof reader than you are, and that I haven’t totally lost my sense of humor. Again thank you! This last part wasn’t work… it was fun.


    PS by “way too much energy” I meant that I can write all day long and not flinch but you are an energy sucker when it comes to guiding and manipulating conversations about dick. The degrees aren’t the only thing that train people to be intelligent, observant, creative, resourceful, talent, patient, kind or humorous. Some of us take it upon ourselves because we like a different kind of school, so why do you suck on my PhD in Observation from the School of Life.

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