You make YOUR OWN RULES Day!

Forget for a moment about the things you’ve been told for years; things like “get eight hours of rest a night,” and “Sometimes you have to do stuff you don’t want to do.” Throw it all out the window.
What would your day look like if you made the rules? Maybe you thrive on five hours of sleep, but you hold yourself in bed for eight because you read somewhere that it’s good for EVERYONE. Only to find that you lost your second wind for the day by “over resting.” Maybe eight is just a standard.
Maybe all these “rules” for living are standards. Maybe you do less than you would like for fear of getting hurt; maybe you have been told your whole life that you are a klutz. What do you think about yourself? What do you enjoy but avoid because of some etheric standard keeps you rooted in behavior outdated for your mode of living?
Maybe you want to try climbing, but tell yourself it’s too late, that your too old. Maybe there is another way to the top, you just haven’t been able to see it through the fear.
What if there were no “10 Commandments,” would you still make righteous decisions, would you still help humanity and your community? Would your internal moral compass lead you in the right direction, or would you waste away in confusion.
Some people function well with a frame work that has been proven by others, but most of us feel constraint from the expectations of these standardized rules. Making the expectations of others our own.
The artistry of living is sending invitation to join the calling of your heart. The pain in our world is crying for healing from Masters of change and Evolution. Are your insides feeling these growing pains?
Forget the rules for a day, live the way your heart calls for. Paint something obscure just to feel the weight of a brush in your hands and to participate in the glory of creation. Find a way to do something that fills you with extraordinary joy. Do something you have only thought about. Life is too short to be stuck in a standard of rules for those who are far from standard. In this day and age there are no longer excuses not to do what your spirit embodied physicality for.
If you have legs, use them. If you have resources, share them. If you have space for others, fill it. If you have knowledge, give it. If you seek guidance, ask for it. If you have love, make it multiply. If all you have is encouragement and a smile, gift them often. If you feel like changing into a better you… start today.
If life lived by your own rules causes you to thrive without forsaking the safety and health of yourself or others, than tell others how it worked for you. Be persuasion to change by always taking the best and leaving the rest. The world needs big thinkers and do-ers. The world needs the involvement of every heart and mind. Wake up, open your eyes, and welcome to a new day.

Cure for the Collective Unrest

We did it again.
Started the summer amped for beach bodies and skinny dipping. Begging to be the best version of ourselves to date. The accessibility of self comparisons to past and present peers is in our faces, thanks to these social networking sites.
In a wave of collective consciousness each status update was a bold exclamation of “self improvement.” The hankering to be lighter, thinner. Somehow perhaps even more spiritually permeable?
We jumped in together, two months ago. Into the diets, exercise and fasting that seem to be a staple response these days to the warmer months. And why not with all those products on the market promising that everyday people can look like stars.
A test: of will power and a change of habits built strong over winter. Habits and attitudes packed tightly into the pounds of fat we tuck away for winter storage. Proving self mutilization to be a bigger predicament world wide than the media would let on. Addictions to stimulants, foods, pain, war and sickness, all wrapped tightly into a comfortable coat we call discouragement.
Our bodies scream to break free, our minds agree; and yet the will broken by time, lags in response. Perhaps the first week or two is easiest. Emotion and determination are fuel for the fire. Jump started metabolisms eased on by early morning runs, walks with loved ones and friends; realization the discouragement coat is too tight… Pushing the limits hard and fast, ultimately leaving a lot of us, some how empty. Emotionally undernourished, physically over-worked, and attacking this whole thing in a very bassakwards way.
Two months down the road; the push of new beginnings finds you looking at a pile of empty beer cans, the question of how the first two weeks could change so quickly and again wondering how you could eat that much cheese.
We feel it together. There is something happening to us as humans seeking deeper communion with ourselves, and one another. An aching so strong we literally want to shed our skin. To tear off the weight of centuries of oppression. We are reaching out in ways new to this world. And still, it is easier to get sucked into this vicarious way of living, checking up on one another just so we can build ourselves up by condemning others. Remembering vividly the pain of youth and holding those who hurt us: once upon a time; responsible even years later.
You told me I was ugly twenty years ago, why do I still hold you responsible. Have I blamed you for so long I have indeed become ugly?
Are we packing all this old baggage in our fat? All the old harbored feelings left unaddressed? The pain and the blame of childhood days now just lingering in the struggle to be better? Inside something doesn’t fell right. We would rather starve ourselves to look better in hopes of feeling more acceptance and deprive the body of personal work to achieve what would be considered an ideal quick cure. We want a cure; instant gratification style. We do not want to slow down to get there. To look too deep into painful waters, to see our own reflection in the common struggle that acts like a wave.
It isn’t easy to look back at comments made by our peers, to take back the blame and become responsible for our personal actions of today.
You may have told me I was ugly, but I was the one who listened, I allowed myself to believe you, too weak to believe in myself. No one forced me. It is me who relives those things on a daily basis to prove you right, because somewhere down the line I didn’t believe I could be worthy of being more than your projection. I couldn’t believe I had anything valid to offer. Externally if there was a consensus of no beauty then internally it must be just as flawed. My fear that everyone felt about me, the way you did, kept me from testing that theory for truth. Instead I created a buffer between me and society. Obviously a buffer built of fat and sadness. The fastest way to alienation in a superficial society is to become a less than optimal aesthetic of yourself. To physically hide behind pain in full view of others. The sensitive are prone to this path.
I don’t even remember your name now, just the horrible things you said that I took for facts. Some where at the back of my mind it’s given me excuses for over consumption of food and drink. I took it into account in every situation where I felt like the underdog.
Quietly confirming this lack of worth. You were never a friend, and never pretended to be; why your words would mean so much to me is hard to perceive. Left only with the reminders of how I have taken your view and made it my own.
You stood for popularity, the one who is liked even though it comes at the sake of others. You could say mean things and they would be taken like sacred relics by your cronies. I could speak truth for the sake of balance and be ignored. Anything you wanted was yours with a word or seemingly so. I have worked very hard for my place in existence, though humble it may be.
I have hung in the background watching the dynamics. I have seen your type come and go, blowing down mountains along the way, always taking the violent road to get to the top. All along, you have a similar pain, and are probably taking it out on yourself in solitude. I have examined this mind and heart, this intention of soul asking whose Truth I have really been living. And at times it is my own; the positive, ambitious, kind and brave attitude that prevails..
Through the ability to self motivate and observe, I see this fear does not serve me, this pain is only a ball and chain, that this buffer of old trauma is no longer my Truth. I am ready to strengthen my will, I am happy to do the work, and I am strong enough to become a better version of myself than has ever existed. I have seen my own personal ability to change. It takes time, and time gets shorter. I must use it wisely, to push harder when it is appropriate. Betterment with out forsaking the Self and the Selves of others, it is always appropriate. Life is rarely instant gratification, and those things that are, prove to be just as fleeting.
The work of change isn’t a month long diet. It’s an adjustment of attitudes and a life long shift that ebbs and flows but never goes away. It realizes that “I am He, as You are Me, and We are all Together.”
This isn’t a time for us to feel condemned to alienation through a pain we all feel. This is a new season where the old adage “Sharing is caring” rings true. Pieces of me, are pieces of you.
In the words of that famous writer Anonymous..” Remember in order to change your life… First; YOU must change, otherwise nothing else will. If you continue to do things as you have always done them, your life will remain the same.”
Let us tear into the layers of our soul and pull back the skin of our fear in order for the best parts of us to show, and for the fragile parts to find communion and healing.
We are not in this alone, we never were. First you must change your mind, and live another way. Open your eyes to new perceptions. We change the world we live in by first becoming righteous examples of the love, life and humor we wish to see in our reality.
The rest is just daily reminders to stay aware and flexible, not an easy task for someone weighed down by outdated modes of thinking.
Shed old thoughts that no longer serve like useless weight on a long trek. Take only what you really need, leave the rest behind. Only those who have made room for the new discoveries ahead will be allowed to partake in what will be offered. Out with the old, in with the new; and be prepared to discover who you really are. What your soul aches to be, the reason it took you so long to see it before. Be prepared to see a bigger picture, not just the microcosm of your personal existence. The interplay of lives that surround you; the affects and effects of moving up in vibration. Be brave, it is not for the faint of heart.

Compliments and distractive apologies

He said he liked my tights. He complimented the painting. A simple “thank you” would have been appropriate. A modest, heartfelt, appreciative “thank you.” Nothing dramatic, or sarcastic. Brief but kind… then on to the next topic of conversation; most likely left to my own responsibility to lead it in, in order to fill the awkward silence that was bound to follow.
This is all in 20/20 of the retrospective kind. Instead of stepping forth into perfected scripting, I took the improvisational route. I looked equally down the cross roads of Sarcasm St. and Self Deprecating Avenue, completely ignoring the “OPEN” sign at the “Keep Your Mouth Shut” Cafe. I needed to take a rest, forgoing a chance to sit down at the Bus stop to ” Smile and Say Thank you.” The options for Sarcasm St. and Self Deprecating Avenue look so tempting with their bright lights and flashy store names like “Sorry I am a Social Oddity,” and the “I have Serious Intimacy Issues” book store. There was the sweets shop that promised “I’m working on it!”; right next to the “Hide an Addiction Boutique.”
What a plethora of options! All far more dramatic and energy consuming than that boring ole bus to “Smile and say thank you.”
That bus; with plush seats, that always smells of vanilla and cinnamon. Where every rider is genuinely happy to see you, and conversations are easy, organically free flowing; and always thought provoking… Ohh, that bus! Why didn’t I take that bus?
That all realized after an exhausting walk down the roads of distractions and apologies.

Baggage, it’s in your car.

As an avid traveler, by means of the personalized vehicle I call a car; I have thought long and hard about the reflection it has in my life. 

 When you travel as much as I do, you like to keep things handy, which at times can mean packing your whole life into one small space.

In my case, it rarely leaves room for passengers.    Passengers take up space that is usually filled by my baggage.

To accept a new rider means I have to clear space for them and their baggage.

You mean, I have to purge stuff to fit them in?


There are times when we have too much baggage in our car to accept a new passenger. To work through the trash tucked beneath seats and move the over flowing suit case from the back seat to the trunk.

In September of 2007 I made the biggest shift in luggage to date. I exchanged some of the things I didn’t need anymore, for a companion animal. A travel buddy requiring far less baggage than a human companion. It didn’t mean she was void of it, her needs were a little different, and it came as a huge adjustment for both of us. We travel the open road, enjoying each others company, at times growing a bit weary of one another in such a small space. She would grow annoyed when I would make a thrift store purchase that would take up half the entirety of the back seat, the equivalent of a doggy Barka Lounger.

Adjustments remade, more purging to be done so that we could ride again with out the clutter and annoyance, of baggage.

How does this example fit your life? Are you driving around with so much baggage and trash in your car that you have a hard time seeing out the back window? Do you constantly try to take on more than you have room for in your life?

With each passenger we attempt to take on, comes everything they choose to bring. Are you willing to clear enough space from your own mounting luggage to take on the luggage of your passengers?

It’s illegal to strap people to the roof, but do you find yourself trying it out, just so you don’t have to attack the problem of your own mounting carry ons?

Some people only have a make up bag and a purse, others have a trailer… maybe your vehicle isn’t made to haul a trailer.

You decide to upgrade, but upgrades are pointless, if most of the baggage is obsolete.

Take inventory; look closely at what you own and how it serves you. Do you find yourself being obsessed with memories dripping in pain? Do you spend most of your time holding tightly to what was, in order to ignore what is? Do you become fixated on how things use to be, instead of focusing on the present?

These attitudes will keep your car bogged down, riding below the speed limit in the slow lane. At some point you are bound to be pulled over for hindering traffic.

You will maybe only receive a warning. This will be a sign to make some adjustments. If you choose to ignore the warning, the next time you get pulled over it may be more severe… perhaps a fine. And your natural inclination may be to be mad about the fine, but you had been warned and all the crap in your windows isn’t helping your vision.

A better attitude would be one of appreciation that someone had brought your attention to a problem you had grown so accustomed to that you no longer saw as a problem, but rather just an extension of yourself. No one said you had to be so bogged down, no one said you had to take everything with you and never let it go. These things are good to do, and everyone has their own timing for the experience.

Perhaps you find yourself at a point in your life where you want company, some one to share the ride with, and like so many others realize there is no room. Perhaps you are carrying things that no longer fit, or appliances that no longer work.

What will you do to make the room. From my experience; I realize for each thing I remove that is no longer serving me, opens the door and clears the space for a new and better utilization of space. When I consciously choose not to add trash to my car; and to only accept what will be a beneficial additive to the ride, the path becomes brighter, lighter, and easier to travel. Keep your vehicle tuned, pay attention to the road, and travel light with good company… or don’t, the choice is up to you.  

With each fork in the road or rest stop on the side there is a chance to blaze a new path and use a dumpster.

New Paradigm

Religion. Such a conflict of interests. My youth was spent in it’s clutches. I wallowed in the fear of an Angry God. A Ethic Father bound to condemn my actions… and being my own worst critic, I figured God must be a scary spirit to embody; all ready to beat me down about my wrongs. Yet, in the same literature we see Him as loving. A God of strong standard with moments of compassion and forgiveness. But which was He really?
I never quite figured out that paradox. How to live a fearless life with the fear of God in my bones. I found myself to already be a conflict of interests; this only added to my mounting confusion. Eventually I took my spirituality into my own hands. Labels had always annoyed me and claiming one in the big gamut of religion, “just one” directive didn’t resonate. It was like reading one author. What happens when you run out of books by that one author? Do you re-read all the literature all over again? There are few books I reread, much less niche myself to the entertainment of one mind. I would rather “take the best and leave the rest,” when it comes to self improvement which is directly connected to my spirituality.
If we have a collective consciousness, and I believe we do, then God must embody many things. You can not say He is “just love,” or “just vengance.” If we are each created in the image, and blessed with the diversity of minds, wouldn’t the “Higher Power” be one of multi-facets? Not one of justifications toward personal vice, or one of complete solitude and reflection; but one that encourages creative thinking, and decision making that comes from the best and Highest good of the individual. A Higher Power that instills humor as well as compassion, pain as well as joy. Experience shows us that when we listen to the “best and most right thing to do” for ourselves, we do not disrespect others. Emotions still come into the game, and yet, no decision is made with the desire to “screw” some one else over. Highest good, tells us, that at times it is okay to say “no.” Even if it is your best friend asking you to help out on something. If our internal voice feels drudgery and resentment for saying yes, how ever silent and harbored the resentment may be, are we not then serving ourselves or our friends. To show up when the heart is not involved serves no one. It’s like going to a job interview with interviewer who is playing solitare during the interview… Both parties are not fully present, and that serves no one. The interviewee is upset by the lack of involvement by the interviewer but feels as though they can not express their feelings because they want the job, and the interviewer is so uninvoloved he can’t tell. By saying “no” or expressing your true internal inclinations in any situation you can save yourself and those around you from falling into a trap that could damage your relationships. It also opens space for someone who is willing be present, and most likely will show themselves to be there as a positive experiences which in turn bless’ all parties.
Religion, did not teach me this. Going to Church, never clued me in. I admit, it taught me to tell the truth, to love my neighbors and to have Faith in things unseen. But I no longer wait for the Biblical Jesus to resurrect those lying dead, dormant and decaying in graves. I see the lesson of the Jesus love and servitude as a calling to rebirth ourselves, to ressurect our damaged hearts and minds into the exaltation that this life, is all we have in the now.
If we are constantly changing, moving, evolving, than the now is all we need. With every decision comes options, and with every option there is a personal truth to be discovered. But we are not aimless in our guidence, the internal compass that points toward truth is activated by our intuition, physical feelings, and ever growing personal consciousness. In every moment we have the chance to grow to become more loving; less selfish, more Selfish ( Selfishness that serves the Higher Self, decision making born out of doing what is best and good for the Self and those around the Self.) more compassionate and accepting…That potential is always speaking and showing oppertunity.
The question is not, “Will I go to Heaven? Will God approve of me?” but rather, “Am I being the best I can in the moment and are my actions hurting or helping humanity?” When as a collective we ask these questions out of a sincere desire to shift the world in to a more positve place… the fear of God will no longer burden us to a life a severe self critism. Because God is not fear, and he is not Self Depricating. God is the best in all of us. The servant attitude, the helping hand, the ability to rest when needed. All of this and more. The Spirit kindly asks us not to pigonhole, because Spirit is far bigger and more encompassing than we give credit for, admit we are only human, spirits babysitting physicality. We are the fractals of spirit in flesh and the world will keep on turning, the Angels will do their visits, but we are only asked to embody love and a desire to seek Truth. From there, the pieces will fall into place as they may, trusting each to their own path; denying no one the oppertunity to seek and grow. Religion is not the answer, acknowledgment of the communal Spirit within each individual and its connection to the same greater nameless Divinity will be the wrecking ball to knock down walls previously seeming unpassable. Worry not about the name your neighbor calls to his “God” but rather, love him because we are all made of the same fabric and we will all end up as dust upon shared wind. Nothing is seperate, one event effects another, and we effect eachother in turn. What do you want from your world? And have you ever felt alone? Anything can change, in a moment.