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insight, kittie cat, life, Writing

A Kittery Tale: My Body is a Playground

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These five rascally little critters are creeping upon nine weeks old.  Which means they are jumping; skipping, side-sliding and scaling EVERYTHING.  Take for instance my legs and my need to wear two pairs of pants because each and every one of these kitteries has taken a running jump onto my calf and attempted to crawl up as far as the fabric would take them.  They are like little lumber jacks, or ice climbers.  They selectively use their claws in unimaginable ways.

Recently they have taken this skill to a whole new challenge with similar height restrictions, but a broader playing area: my back, while cleaning the litter box.  There I am all hunched over feces, making sure everyone is feeling confident about their next poo when one or more of them take a running leap at my back.  I mean, obviously claws are involved in this, they are learning the the “running-jump and cling”.   This may or may not be a problem for me on any given day on account of what shirt I am wearing and the surface area that it covers plus thickness of material or lack there of.  “Lack of material” immediately inserts a negative into the question which = claws in skin which may be multiplied by the depth of penetration.

I never thought my body would be a playground.  I never knew that someone should recommend wearing Carharts, gloves and denim in order to deal with furry, sharp-sharp furriness.

Here is the juxtaposition that makes it even harder… They can be SO gentle and sweet; it is selective and you have to pay attention and the less you pay attention the more likely you are to meet some sort of feline wrath.

Perhaps you are a seasoned kitterycat enthusiast/ companion; for me this is my third instillation of “learning experiences” that have been growing more intense over time and as I’ve mentioned before, my first “hands on from birth of the feline species” experience.  I really didn’t know what to expect and what people told me to do, I kind of bounced it around and felt it out, ultimately disregarding it to the degree of augmenting it and seeing what worked in my situation.

I am by no means disappointed, in fact this whole thing has been amazing but not always perfect.

You know how I was saying that one needs to pay attention to the feline signs?  Well I do, over all; certain calls for food or new litter (and in Quantum’s case, to go outside or the fact she is tired of her kin), the kittens are in the experimental hunting phase of looks, eye connection (or lack thereof) and “mad-dogging”.

Here is how it usually goes down:   I want to lay down and primarily settle down for the night but the minute I walk through the door everyone wants attention and they are fired up.  When they are fired up they wrestle and run around and jump on everything or claw anything until their tiny little muscles say “STOP!”

I lay in bed and they treat me like some Kittery CrossFit that includes; running laps, using my bun like a weighted rope, high diving off of shelves and stealthily trying to bite/lick my eyes, ears, nose, mouth and chin.  If I was more invested I would come up with proper names for the crazy events this clan of Kittery participates in, daily.

My least favorite event, is “Stare Her Down With Looks Of Love And Then Take Swift Bats At Her Face.”  A kittery will get all close to my face hole; all big eyes and looks of curiosity.  Then they start bobbing around a little, probably because they are focusing on a place on my face to plant a claw (if they are ruthless) or just a paw (if they are somewhat scary yet playful)  and then it is “GAME ON”.   My hands already look like I not only cut myself (for fun, of course) but also as though I have experienced the “stigmata”… raisin’ kitteries ain’t easy.

Admittedly I have had to learn to retaliate from this physical abuse.  Some of the events in my height and weight Cat-agory are ” Shake ‘Em Off Like a Dog”, Human Earth Quake, Kittery Toss, and Quicker Reflexes.

I think “Kittery Toss” is fun for everyone.

When I walk through the door, they know my gait coming down the hall.  They not only swarm but also they try and escape.  I suppose it isn’t appropriate to kick them around like soccer balls, so, I pick them up one by one and gently toss them (American Quaterback Football Style) onto my bed.   If one goes, they all watch and they jet quickly to greet their tossed sister or brethren on the landing pad with some good ole fashion kitty wrestling.    I just keep tossing them up there and they just keep coming back for more.   It’s the one event that seems to leave me uninjured and the kitteries highly entertained.

If you want to read about the first two episodes click here Quantum Express~ A Kittery Tale and here A Kittery Tale: Sleep Deprivation and Emerging Personalities.

insight, kittie cat, life, Writing

Quantum Express~ A Kittery Tale

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On November 9, 2018 my friend Devon walked out of my garage to his car, and exclaimed “Do you know this cat?”

From where I was sitting, I couldn’t see what was on the other side of the door.  Immediately I thought “Well, probably not because I rarely see cats just roaming around my neighborhood.” However, much like Schrödinger, my curiosity got the best of me.

“What cat?” I exclaimed, jumping from my chair and racing to the door.  There I saw a slim, small violet Siamese cat with an injured paw.  She sidled up to the drivers side rear wheel of my car and peered at me coyly.   I knelt down and called her to me, to my surprise she walked forward to me.  She allowed me to scoop her up to look at her paw.  A small injury, but it looked  like it had been deep and healing a while.  The gash in her paw almost appeared as if she had been stuck to ice, and ripped away her pad.

She allowed me to take her inside, clean up her paw and add some Vertricyn to the wound.  She was cuddly and appeared to want to stay close.  How could I say no?

I immediately took to social media; the after hours Animal Shelter site on Facebook, and any other local group that I noticed posts of lost or missing animals. I took her to the vet to see if she was chipped. Negative.  I posted on Nextdoor, a social networking site for neighborhoods.  I called the Animal Shelter. I waited a day and then I went out and bought her food; litter, a litter box and a dish and a couple of toys.

This girl was so sweet, someone must be missing her. It was just before the holiday season, I thought to myself, “Well maybe she was being pet sat and sneakily escaped.  Maybe her person is on vacation or deployment and the cat sitter doesn’t want to worry her owners while they are away.”  I was constantly checking my post, and posts about cats in my area.  Pretty much, nothing.

About a month after the kittery had been hanging out, a woman on the Nextdoor site, insisted it was hers.  That she had left town on November 10 and had only recently returned.  I demanded pictures and descriptions.  Her cat looked nothing like the one I had been treating as my own for the past four weeks.  The markings were all wrong.  She felt dead set it was hers, so I took a risk and said “If you feel that strongly about it, here is my address, come on over and see for yourself.”   Fifteen minutes later she texted back saying that she was called into work (at the military base across town, where she lives) and that she would be sending one of her guy friends to come by.

Honestly I got a little panicked.  I didn’t know if this was a demanding boyfriend type guy or what.  I texted her to drop it until tomorrow and come for herself but she didn’t respond to the message.  Approximately 45 minutes later I got a knock on the door from a short, kind of effeminate Hispanic male and a  slightly taller Hispanic female.  Both seemed somewhere between mid twenties to early thirties.  They explained the situation on their end, and I went to get the cat for their inspection.

I brought the cat out in my arms, lazily purring.  Immediately the woman said, ” Can I pet her? ”  And I reply “Yes.” because I have only seen this cat friendly to people (unless hungry).  She is a lover.  The lady pets the cat and says “This isn’t our friends cat.  Her cat literally hates me.  She tries to attack me anytime I am near her.”  Her male companion proceeds to look the cat over and agrees, “this isn’t the missing cat.”

I tell them my end of the story, and of my growing attachment, and how I thought it would be weird for a cat from the west side of town to make it all the way over here and then not try to go home.  They admit that their friend use to live in the apartments across the street, but it had been over a year and a half ago.  We thanked each other for our time and patience, and they went along on their way.   I cuddled the kitty deeper, and decided a month was long enough to wait for an owner to appear, and then I had the weirdest thought.

What if the owner of this cat died, and the cat slipped out when EMS arrived to remove the body?  Cryptic, right?  I got a strong sensation this was the case.  This cat had been stray for a while, and it was looking for the right person to adopt.  I had proven to her that I care for her well being.  Her love was strong and instant.  All of a sudden I felt “chosen” , again; a feeling I haven’t had since I found my Claddagh Dog.

This cat needed a name.  From the first moment, she just somehow integrated so perfectly.  I continued to let her outside, in hopes she would just find her own way back home.  I’d let her out at night, when traffic is less… and every morning I would wake up to pee and think of her and she would magically appear at my bedroom window.  I would let her in, pour her a bowl of food and lay back down.  She would eat her food, and come nestle herself in the crook of my bent knees.  We would sleep a while, and when I would get up she would make the smallest squeak as to say “Don’t move, I like it here with you.”

Some nights it was a battle of the bed.  Claddagh usually wants front seat being the little spoon against my chest, and occasionally the kittery was first to call it.  Claddagh would seem disappointed, nevertheless would curl up at my feet at the bottom of the bed.

See, I am so blessed with my animals.  Claddagh is a dream come true Dog.  She is so perfect.  She had her issues in the beginning but most of that stuff is out of her system.  She has had a kittery before, she is gentle and observant. I trust her to be kind to the kittery, however I do not trust her alone in a room with a dirty litter box.  It’s good to know every ones boundaries.

This cat still needs a name.  What do I think of her, when I think of her?  Well, it’s like she just came out of nowhere.  Like, she manifested from some other dimension in Time Space.  Quantum.   Quantum Dream Cat.  Oh shit, you know that kitty is here to teach you something.

So,  Quantum came into my life, accepted her name and knows it.  If she is outside and I call her name silently, inside of my head, she arrives.  Admittedly I was a lazy owner,   taking for granted the fact that I don’t really know anything about this cat except the fact that she is extremely clean, loving and chipless.   She likes wet and dry food, and as she is getting more comfortable with her surroundings, she wants to be held less.  I still let her out for a few hours each night/early morning.  She continues to return.  Sometimes, she just jumps up on my window sill and watches me sleep, waiting for me to wake up and look at her to let her in.  Her voice is quiet most times, unless she is super urgent or agitated.  She doesn’t beg to be let in, she just waits.  Claddagh wants to hump her and I think it’s funny to watch the Animal Planet live from my bedroom.  Something tells me the kittery might be in heat, so I start to keep her in.

In all honesty, I love this situation but I am sort of weirded out.  All of a sudden I feel some spiritual “Level Up”.

Okay.  So. I know. I should have taken her to the vet the moment I took down all the posts and claimed her as mine.  I should have, but I didn’t.  I checked for a spay scar, and didn’t see one, so, that is totally a “my bad.”  I was handling Quantum quite a bit on a daily basis, and the moment her little teets no longer looked like little pieces of dried rice, I went to Google to confirm what I suspected.  Pregnancy.  Fuck.  But, what do you do, right?  So far as I know, there is no Feline Plan B.  Again, what have I gotten myself into?  Immediately I start a Google crash course in pregnant Siamese Cats.