Tag Archives: family

What do you know you know that you remember?

Microcosm-  Inception- You

While in the womb, you just grew and developed and thought whatever thoughts developing souls think cushioned in a vitreous bubble

Listening to the voices outside of yourself as you are jumbled and tumbled around by your incubator, the love of your creator holds you still and yet, not

You didn’t consciously think “I should grow an arm right now”, while your mother craved pickles and puked at the smell of salmon, or laughed at a joke she once told, and then forgot and told again

She didn’t think about her loss or change of appetite as anything other than a sort of synthesis where you were able to show your first impressions of the world, which were merely reflections of the last one you left

Connected yet disconnected by a few stops from your last departure

As a Mother, she, just kind of dealing with it.  And hoped for the best.  “I don’t care what it is- as long as it is healthy!  Ten fingers!  Ten toes.”

She didn’t sit to manifest you, but rather said, “So it is, I guess this will do.”

The Mother Knows, that these impressions can last longer than a lifetime and the purging of herself in the openness of newness is proof.  Suddenly a new entity, little-me arrives!

To some, on a sunny day and to others a rainy night.

In each of us, there is the reflection of the Mother, for we could not exist without her.

But in each Mother, there is a reflection of eternity, and she graciously imparts that upon us without request.  It is a shock for all parties, and a strange blessing without a manual.

The impression is beyond permanent, it is in the genetics and all of the beautiful unfoldings that appear to be effortless

 

 

 

 

My Best Friend’s Journey: More Than Meets The Eye

I have the best of Best Friends.  She comes round, again and again.  Always more beautiful than the time before- soul refinement and blessings galore.

 

Love, Life and Ego Death

Today I give some contemplation on the escalation of the number of individuals experiencing Ego death in our modern world, also known as depression. I discuss where people can get lost when it happens, it’s purpose overall and the way to endure it and come out the other side.

 

Testing the Water

Alright.  Cheers and welcome.

I am making an attempt to add to my creative satiation by creating a a podcast that has no specific direction.  Neat huh?

If it was a personal ad, it would say ” Seeking Interesting Conversation”

“Hermit Noun seeks insightful conversation with people who would rather discuss vs. argue.  Seeking people who like to think out of the box but still navigate with a moral compass.  Hoping to do more than compare notes and commiserate, let’s find the treasure together and share the bounty- ”

Cute. Right?

I guess I don’t really care and it’s one of those moments when I again throw caution to the wind and set it forth.  I will ask your assistance in momentum, because it will dictate a certain direction – This is definitely for me and you, but I want your help and involvement to make it something worth while.  Think of it as a group project, a collaborative effort where I do most the work, but I don’t actually have to do anything at all because, duh, we aren’t in high school and this experiment is a choice, not a mandate.

FUN!

If you have a half hour- check  out my shaky, unguided pilot.  If you do, I would appreciate it if you leave a comment and tell me what you think (good, bad- whatever.)  If you check it out, share it, even if you don’t like it.   Maybe it wasn’t for you today.  But I bet you know someone who might like it because you like me and that is how networking works on the most pure of levels.

I’m pretty excited to share this rather impromptu recording regardless…. It’s nice to put my voice out there again- talking about the daily reflection.  Today I compare our desires  and obligations/ draws and distractions- to a junk drawer.

Interwoven

Renaissance (n.)

“great period of revival of classical-based art and learning in Europe that began in the fourteenth century,” 1840, from French renaissance des lettres, from Old French renaissance, literally “rebirth,” usually in a spiritual sense, from renastre “grow anew” (of plants), “be reborn” (Modern French renaître), from Vulgar Latin *renascere, from Latin renasci “be born again, rise again, reappear, be renewed,” from re- “again” (see re-) + nasci “be born” (Old Latin gnasci, from PIE root *gene- “give birth, beget”).An earlier term for it was revival of learning (1785). In general usage, with a lower-case r-, “a revival” of anything that has long been in decay or disuse (especially of learning, literature, art), it is attested from 1872. Renaissance man is first recorded 1906.

 

I like the parts of this etymology that says “grow anew” or to be “born again” , “reappear.”I like it because it is true, time is not linear and more and more these days we are allowed to reconnect with deep soul kin… essentially elongating our interaction through these different wave lengths and time lines.

I am living this now and I want to share some of it with you.  Obviously my series about My Best Friend(‘s Journey)  is some of the amazing proof of this reality.

My creativity is expressed in many ways: these blogs, the journals, the scraps, the paintings, the music and the spoken word I can’t contain.  So much content with context.

I wanted to create a post with all the links to the music up to now because my creative collaborator Alessandro Muresu is some sort of vibration soul mate born on another continent.   He is precious to me because he brings out the best in what I struggle with in experiment AND his passion bleeds through his work, for whatever reason he also found me a compatible collaborator and what happens through sound files is soothing for us both.  Feeling old and familiar, but new and extraordinary.

I shall not build it up too much more.

Preface-  All of these sound qualities have a drone, which is the specialty of Ale.  I am the chaos that interferes but can also create soothing.  Ale brings all of the balance in composition.  My success’ are accidental.  I am sloppy but focused. I have no idea what I am doing, but I love manipulating sound.  My voice is a tool to those ends.  These are posted from earliest to most recent.  I invite you to listen to the evolution of it over all and to visit the rest of Alessandro’s Archive of Wonder.

If you don’t want to listen to all of them, pick one for now out of what you are drawn to.  It’s probably the right one for you in the moment.

Listen to Yourself

FTC Part 1

 

FTC Part 2

Squeaky Floor

Save

Ode (To Us)

173 Part 1

173 Part 2

173 Part 3

173 part 4

177

Karibu

Recording 21

Rudiments

Recording 15

 

*Credits to my late Grandfather Edward Lee Chapman for the heading photo in this post.  He really had an eye for light and shadow.

 

 

 

 

 

My Best Friend’s Journey: Maggie

I don’t remember the exact year that Maggie came into my life.  She was a childhood dog.  I think I must have been nine or ten; My first childhood dog Pepper, was reaching up there in age and I suppose my parents thought it was a good idea to bring in another dog so the death transition wasn’t too traumatic for young children who had their mother die.

There is no way I would ever be thinking about this if it wasn’t for the here and now, and the timeless nature of things.

Okay, so, Maggie was a Brittany Spaniel my folks picked up from the local shelter.  She was young and energetic… she really liked to jump up on people, which is an “unwanted behavior”.  I was at an age where I had to perform chores for an allowance, and one of those chores was picking up dog shit.  I would try and have fun with Maggie as I cleaned up the dog yard.  One of the things I would do is try and get her to not jump up on me, that is like dog 101.

Maggie didn’t have a super long life.  She died in my New Kids On the Block blanket, it was my prized possession about the time she came into our life.   It seemed right she passed on in it.

I didn’t realize that I have been working with her too.  I never thought of her as “my dog.”  I wasn’t allowed to even if I wanted to.  She was a “family dog.”  Probably so that my brother and I didn’t argue about such nuance.   I’ve literally been picking up animal poop in some capacity for the last 28 years.  You only do that stuff for true love, and in return, a true Love will try and make that as easy on you as possible if they are aware of how you struggle with it.

Maggie knew that I thought picking up crap was horrible,  but I think she also sensed my magic and imagination tied to the desire to try and make a miserable task bearable. True durability of connection.

When I was a kid, I wanted an animal of my own SO BAD!  I wanted something that was my own that I loved deeply.  When I finally was able to do that- the situation was so weird.

I rescued a meat rabbit from the neighbors.  They had hired me to feed their animals while they were out of town and I fell for one of their rabbits. So my dad built a hutch and I was able to have this Hunny Bunny.  She was reddish and had a black accent and this little bald mole spot above and to the side of her right eye.  It was that spot that made me want her.

Our relationship didn’t work out. She definitely needed more attention, and she had to sleep outside in the hutch all of the time.  It isn’t the way I would treat a bunny.  But my parents were more about having domestic “outside” animals and rules for things like that.  I wanted to cuddle with furballs.

I remember telling my dad that the rabbit was getting vicious and we needed to send it back to nature so we let her go down by a pond near our house… where I didn’t think she would last very long.  And that is what we did… we gave her back to nature.

I now see Hunny in Quantum Dream Cat. So this story isn’t going to stop.  If animals are here to assist us in being elevated humans, I am full on board.  I am listening.

I don’t remember how I felt with Maggie passing on the couch, in my blanket.   Once she started seizing, my parents made us leave.

I’ve been well acquainted with death while also dealing with it many times over my lifetime from an early age.

Claddagh was my first real experience with it all suddenly and first hand with extreme emotional attachment.   Everything else has been leading up to facing that moment and knowing that “The End” is never REALLY “The END.”

Again I will say, I am so full of love right now.  This is quite the experience.  It is certainly meant to be shared and understood for the vastness that it is.  This Truth swept beneath rugs meant to accumulate sorrows.  It is hard to talk about because it is hard to conceptualize that the whole thing is one beautiful conversation with All That Is.

These gifts, despite tragic ends, are proof of that which is hard to speak.

 

 

My Best Friend’s Journey: The Unfolding

It is Tuesday night.  Journey has had two full days with me.

Here, I am going to compile a list of similarities that I have seen in her that I knew to be distinctive Claddagh traits and other interesting synchronizations that I have observed. It is like Claddagh 2.0… maybe this is what happens when you get animals near Roswell…

  1.  The first time I ever took Claddagh in the car, we mutually wanted to hold hands.  On drives, we would often “hold hands.”  – Journey did the same thing on her first car ride with me.
  2. The “give me a hug” prompt- paws on my lap, “full hug” paws on shoulders.
  3. Same gentle nature about taking treats, and transporting her “baby doll” (new stuffy.)
  4. Played Bastille “Pompeii” and sang full volume with her and the cats and they acted like this was old news.  Which it is… or was like back in June or July I was on a kick.
  5. Her type of breed is Mountain Cur.  A type of hound used to tree small animals and hunt small game. They were prized during the times of the American Settlers and are considered the original Pioneer dog.  Pioneers would bring puppies by caravan, at times carrying them to the next destination.  This is Journey’s litter-al story. And there is a sacrificial squirrel here, meant to taunt and teach her- that is a whole story in itself.
  6. My uncle is fearful of pits, but an absolute lover of hounds.
  7. Everything that I transmitted about this living situation to this dog, though my heart is playing out like it’s already been lived.
  8. When I look at her I am 100% comforted and satisfied like being with an old friend and she treats me the same way.  My bed (or ours?) is her favorite spot in the house, besides being by my side.
  9. I know when her tail is in the proper position she is “integrated.”  Tonight, she was sitting like a normal dog, tail out, and not tucked under herself.  She is whipping it around like a very happy entity.
  10. The first night Journey was here, she peed and pooped in the garage.  She peed on the box of all the stuff I removed from the Malibu before taking it to salvage.  The car I had as long as I had Claddagh.
  11. She fell in love with my dad right away.
  12. She enjoyed having a conversation with my Uncle today, in the sunshine, in the same spot Claddagh would hang out with him almost every day.
  13. Claddagh had the cutest little underbite, Journey has the most perfect teeth I have ever seen on a dog.  Almost like she had braces.
  14. Both of them have the same intersection of “third eye kiss zone”.  Claddagh’s was her black dot.  Journey’s is her brindle radiation.
  15. Claddagh knew what it was like to be spayed before ever getting pregnant, like Capricious.  Journey knows what it is like to lose her litter and be spayed like Quantum.  (Like I am saying, it’s Claddagh 2.0)
  16. It took years for Claddagh to learn to be patient for the door to open, and even when she got it, at times she would be pushy.  Journey steps aside and prefers to be invited in.  (There is no reason this dog should have been on death row, right?  Maybe that is the first place you should look for your soul animal. )
  17. Claddagh going to the animal shelter about a month before passing and acting like a complete confident dog when I picked her up.  Like “I mastered this. I can do it again.”  And me making mental note of that at the time.
  18. All the things you should absolutely not do when meeting a dog for the first time when you know nothing about them- I did confidently.  I can dress this dog up and she acts like the same limp noodle I use to know.  I can get in her face and I know she won’t bite it off.  I can touch her paws and look into her mouth.  The eyes really are the window to the Soul.

I mean, you can take it or leave it… but why would you want to, if you know that your reality is bigger and better and more amazing than you are taught to believe?  Why?

I constantly talk about my dedication to Creation, all of this is confirmation of my faith and trust in the extraordinary.  Extra Ordinary.  There is still more to be explored.

I suffer the affliction of the heart.  At times how to express it.  This contract with this animal soul allows me to channel it and stay grounded.  She isn’t just a “pet”.

‘Claddagh’ is the Irish wedding band. Hands holding a heart with a crown.  You can show if you are taken or not by its position.  It stands for “Love, Loyalty, and Friendship” the circular band is Infinity.   When I finally knew what Claddagh’s name was, I was committed 100% for FOREVER past the Apocalypse.  I know it sounds crazy… but look at the times we are living in.

My soul has work to do and I can’t do it without that companionship.

For more info watch the link: Animals and the Afterlife with Jennie Taylor Martin